Brainwashing Tool #7: Tell them what they’re missing at home

Posted on 18. Oct, 2008 by admin in Brainwashing, Combating, Divorce, Exposing the methods, Visitation

I’ve experienced this now several times, so it’s time to expose it to other parents.

When your child is with you but talking on the phone to their other parent, one tool the parent uses to lessen the value of your child’s visitation at your home is to tell them great stuff that awaits them back home.

The past two visits, my son has been reminded of both a horse purchase and a fish tank purchase. “Aren’t you excited to come back and see your new horse?” “This aquarium is so amazing, don’t you wish you could see it?”

You’ll see other variations such as:
1. Parent telling the child that he missed his friend’s birthday party, or some other function
2. Parent telling the child how much he’s missed, multiple times, to make the child feel guilty about being away
3. Parent acting as though the stay is terrible for the child, saying things like “everything will be alright, Charlie, you’ll be home in just two days and things will be fine again.”

Tips to combat this pointless behavior from the parent who’s lashing out?

Have a normal, fun time with your kids. At the end of every day of your visitation ask them, “What did you enjoy doing most today?” And take a few pictures and videos every day. Post them online, or somewhere that the child can see them. Make the actions memorable, which will be far more powerful than the other parent pulling down the child’s enjoyment with you using words.

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One Response to “Brainwashing Tool #7: Tell them what they’re missing at home”

  1. Carol

    21. Jan, 2010

    I am a mother, grandmother and great-grandmother- and I am so sick of the women I’ve seen manipulating their innoscent children in a divorce-custody battle. i have expereinced it with two of my sons divorces. The latter being the worse I’ve ever seen in my life. My son fought for custody for over 7 years and just now got his children fromt he mother. She pulled every rick in the book-mostly illegal- she didn’t care-whatever worked. She has damaged my grandchildren most likely for the rest of their lives. Now that he has custody she calls every day fromt he day he got them-several times daily and uses her brainwashing tactics still by phone. Everything mentioned on this site plus things that aren’t she has done and is doing. She’s admitted to drug use on the stand, admitted to mail tampering on the stand, taken federal funds from my son after the divorce for a year and a half- manipulated witnesses and chiildren to testify on her behalf and spy. She calls my sons home and makes violent threats to him if she can’t talk to them whenver and as many times as she wants daily so she can disrupt everyone else’s lives. She is destorying the children and has no reason to do the things she does except for her own anger and hatred. She had an affair during their marraige and bore another amans child during my son’s marraige. She is the bad parent- how does one help the children to overcome this sort of manipoulation from their mother??!!

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